


Weak for you.

by screamingwriter



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Getting Together, Happy Ending, Heavy Angst, Hospitalization, Kissing, M/M, Major Character Injury, Mentions of Death, Mentions of almost death, Poison, Realization, buck gets hurt on the job, eddie gets emotional af, tags sound heavy but i swear it's going to be some good buddie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-13
Updated: 2019-04-13
Packaged: 2020-01-12 16:57:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18450776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/screamingwriter/pseuds/screamingwriter
Summary: There were only three times Eddie felt like dying.War, Christopher in pain, and now watching Buck collapse on the ground barely breathing.





	Weak for you.

**Author's Note:**

> so i can't tag for shit and i so don't know what else to write so i decided on some angst so feel free to comment any prompts and yeah don't hate me if this sucks because I feel like it does and its stressing me out but enjoy !!

 

       Eddie knew fear. 

He'd lived it every day since his tours, he lived it every day when Christopher left his side. He didn't, however, know the fear he felt when he watched Buck collapse to the ground. 

It was some sort of gas and it came out of nowhere--the team wasn't told of any toxic threats--they're there for something else entirely.

It happens suddenly and there's a hiss and it comes into contact with Bucks face and he breathes it in. Eddie hears Bobby shouting orders but he only sees Buck's face turning red and his eyes wide open.  _He can't breathe..._

Eddie's not sure what happens next, one minute the teams in the building and the next they aren't. He can't even remember how he got Buck onto his shoulders but he does and they are out of there quicker than possible. "Take my hand and squeeze!" Eddie shouts, he flimsily reaches up and grabs Bucks hand. 

He feels the squeeze as rushes outside. 

_Keep squeezing._

Buck is starting to shake and his grip weakens and Eddie swears his heart almost stops. 

He makes it to the grass and lays Buck down--he's red in the face and not breathing. 

" _Eddie!"_

_"Diaz, you gotta move!"_

Hen and Chim push him out of the way but Eddie lingers, he can't leave him. He can't leave Buck. Hen and Chim start working on him instantly, they start pulling off his gear to get to his chest. Eddie sees a flash of a needle and someone saying, "Six minutes since his last intake of air." It doesn't feel like six minutes. 

Eddie knows what needs to happen, he knows that Hen and Chim have one shot at the heart. 

"Buck, you need to stay with us." Bobbys voice is muffled and Eddie knows he's speaking into his radio now. 

Eddie thinks about how they never got to figure anything ou. The whole mess that was his marriage to Shannon and the feelings he and Buck had for each other. They'd insisted it would be figured out but it hadn't and now the chance to even do that hung in the air. 

"Come on, Buck. It's me--it's going to be okay." Eddie whispers, he reaches forward and lays his hand against Bucks cheek. His eyes swim with tears when Buck leans into the touch just before he shuts his eyes. "Hey! Open your eyes, Buck--open your eyes." Eddies voice raises and he feels someone start to grasp him. 

Eddie tries to break free but hands are holding him as more people crowd around Buck--he can't see him anymore and he... he feels his legs start to weaken and it goes black. 

\-----

 

       Eddie wakes up in the hospital. For a minute he has no idea why he's there but he's not alone. Shannon comes into view and she smiles at him, she reaches forward and he feels her hand against his cheek and a flash of Buck on the ground glimpses before his eyes. 

" _Buck_." Eddie hears the monitor start to beep faster and it all comes back. He had his hand in the exact place with Buck--he remembered the hands holding him back as people closed in around Buck who had been so red... "Where is he? How---how is he?" Eddie moves his face away from Shannon's touch and he starts to get up. He feels it all coming back and he wants to scream when Shannon doesn't answer, she tries to touch him and soothe him but he can't--he needs to know where Buck is. 

"Eddie, you need to calm down." Shannon gently says to him, both her hands reach her husbands face. 

No, no, no. He doesn't mean to but he reaches up and grabs her wrists, he rips them away from his face and snaps, "No I don't. I _need_ to see Buck." He says this more harshly than he means but it startles the woman and lets him stand up. He shakes off whatever's attached to him and exits the hospital room. 

A hall. There's a hallway that seems impossibly long and it feels like forever until he sees any of his team. 

"Where is he?" 

Bobby stands up first and he's been crying and Eddie wants to start shouting because no one is saying anything. He doesn't understand why nobody is talking, they keep looking to the Captain who sets a hand down on Eddies shoulder. The contact feels like a sting. 

"Where is he? Someone tell me where he is." 

" _He's in his room."_

The voice comes from behind him and Eddie turns to see Maddie--she's a mess but she smiles at him and for the first time since he woke up in the awful building he feels like he can breathe. She sees this and gestures her hand towards the long hall, "When he woke up he was in the same state," She must see Eddie's expression because she tells him the room number and steps aside, Maddie tells Bobby to let him be. 

Eddie didn't know what to expect when he burst through that door. He hadn't known what to expect since he'd woken up from passing out but here he was. He pushed open the door and there was Buck. 

His eyes were bloodshot and he looked bad. Like really bad. 

But he was **_here_** and **_alive_**. 

Eddie ignored every part of him that told him to think before doing what he did, he ignored the voice reminding him of who he was meant to be committed to. He ignored the fact that he and Buck hadn't talked about anything. He ignored it all because he was here. 

Eddie lunges across the room and he throws his arms around the man, he finally releases the breath he'd been talking about as he presses his face in the crook of Bucks neck. " _You're okay._ " He whispers into his skin. Bucks arms slide around his waist and he's reminded of how Buck squeezed his hand and then didn't. 

He doesn't realize that he's crying until Buck makes them pull apart and wipes at the tears sliding down his face. 

"I am," Buck smiles, "I'm okay--we're okay." 

Eddie can't help it, he leans in so that his forehead is pressed against Bucks. He continues to ignore everything that he knows he should be listening to.

There was a certain heaviness to his chest before but as he feels Bucks breath against his lips, it vanishes and he can't help it, he leans in more so that their noses brush and it would only take one tiny movement to get where they both shouldn't want as much as they do. 

"Eddie," Buck whispers, he starts to move away because he's Buck. He wants to be good and doesn't want to do anything that he thinks Eddie will regret.

But Eddie shakes his head and he's weak for Buck-- _they both are for each other_ \--because neither of them hesitates when their lips come together.

The kiss is full of pain and need and its everything that Eddie imagined. Bucks lips are rougher like he expected and he instantly opens his mouth for Eddie. 

A simple kiss shouldn’t feel as good as this one does. 

Buck makes some sort of noise, like he’s content and it makes Eddies body tingle. 

They break apart and both listen to each other's breathing.

Eddie reaches for Buck again, he thought for sure that he'd lost him and Eddie can't ignore that like he can ignore everything else his brain is telling him.

He wraps his arms around the man again and lets his face fall back to the crook of Bucks neck, he thinks that he could stay here forever. 

_He wants to stay here forever._

One of Bucks hands slide up to the back of his head into his hair and Eddie can feel the pressure of his fingertips against his scalp. It's a reminder that Buck is here with him and also a reminder for what he has to do. 

"Eddie..." 

He wants the world to pause for just a minute. 

"Just hold me," Eddie mumbles, "Please." 

So Buck does... 

He holds him until Eddies ready to do what he knows he has to do. He holds him because Eddies about to walk out of the hospital room and break the heart of the woman he once loved for the man he loves and wants-- _needs--_ more than anything. 

 

 

 

 


End file.
